Is somebody out there?

Crying for nothing.

I Know.
Don't want to blame anoyone.
People don't mean to hurt each other so easy. It Heppens.
There's no big deal.
But still....
Can't stop crying.

And again: so angry at myself.
Something is happening and I can't find what is wrong.
Can't see the whole picture.
Can't find peace.
Why is that??

Everything seems so meanless...><

My little brother said to me: "It seems that everything you are doing it's an a obligation" "You don't need to force yourself to do all this. you can relax."
But I'm already relaxed!!!!
I Chose my way.
I AM truly happy to be here. Really Greatful. Really willing to learn, to live.
So... why is it like this?
My heart is nowhere.

I know where it should be.
I shouldn't be anxious for anything. Not even about my faith.
I should trust. (and here I am talking about what i should or shouldn't be doing u.u]

Maybe after all I am not who I thought I was...
Just... letting myself down.

Don't like pity.
Don't want this.
But I feel that If I keep crying, It is the only thing I'll get.

Just... Forget it.